Wednesday, September 7, 2011


Scares the shit out of me!

I think the whole process is incredibly awkward. You meet someone - or in this case, you email and text someone - and then you have to spend sometime having dinner, or meeting somewhere and having a conversation. It's not all that simple though.

Do you know how many times I have to change my outfit so that I look just right. I don't want to look too slutty or too conservative. I don't want to look fat. I don't want wear something like I am going out to a club, or even something I would go out partying. It is not easy to find the perfect outfit.

Then I have to worry about my hair. Do I straighten it or do I keep it curly? If I leave it curly, what happens if it doesn't curl the right way? If I straighten it, what if it rains? I have to make sure it looks just right.

Do I wear my glasses or do I wear my contact? What kind of makeup do I put on? I don't want to wear too much, but I want to make it look like I am trying to look good.

What kind of shoes do I wear? Do I wear one of my favorite pairs of heels or do I wear flats?

Do you see why this is a problem?!?!

Then you go out to dinner and you sit there and think what do I eat? Do I eat something healthy or do I get something unhealthy? Do I get something that I could possibly make a huge mess out of? All this questioning and then I have to worry about if I have food in my teeth! Then what do I drink? Do I go with my typical Diet Coke? Do I order an alcoholic beverage to calm my nerves?

All this going through my head as I have to hold a conversation!!!

It is all way to overwhelming to deal with. I have had two guys ask me out this week. I thought I was going to throw up! It is all way too much to deal with. I wish it could be simple. I wish I didn't over think things. I wish it could just happen...


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